361.Wishes to keep creating

I've rekindled some of my old ways over the summer, and happily got back into doodling/painting/making art just for my self. To keep my motivation going and because I have this conviction that no matter how crappy and unworthwhile you think your work is you should share it, I have started a lil' art tumblr. Have a nosey or don't at sofiescholtenart.tumblr.com  even though it's still in the embryonic stages.
Sofie

also if you have an art tumblr then send me your links below, as I'm using this tumblr to keep TABS ON ALL OF YOU!

360.Wishes for better sex ed

watercolour doodle that I painted recently

I fucking love sex. Not that I have much experience, in a realm as large as the universe I’ve only explored our solar system, with much left to discover beyond even the discoveries mapped out by scientists. Though an intrepid explorer you could say my read knowledge outweighs my practical experience, yet I’ve got a libido for both.

This drive may have been influenced by my sexually enthusiastic friend or my unenthused school sex education. If sexuality in all its forms is so key to humanity, health and happiness I do wonder why in the UK at least it is not freely discussed in schools alongside our compulsory doses of Math, Science and English? Where was porn, masturbation, erotica, body positivity, communication tatics, BDSM, real anatomical explanations, sexuality, gender, intersexuality amongst a multitude of other topics on the curriculum? Luckily for me the internet filled, and continues to fill those gaps, yet what of those who do not have internet access or find information too late or just may not have the initial curiosity? For their sake I do hope all those screaming about the insidious effect of sex heavy media on our teens will turn their fervourent  voices to the advocacy of clear, inclusive and critical sex education.

                      

In my own journey I hope to find a place were my fervoured support will soon be of use. In the meantime I’d love to point you in the direction of some of the sexy things I’ve been watching and reading:-

• Laci Green's Sex+ is a one stop video shop for informative friendly sex ed, and you can also find her at her other channel A Naked Notion.
• Scarleteen  is similiar to Sex+ but in the written format, giving the chance for more in depth discussion.
  

• Sexplanations is a new channel run by the very cute, but also really informative sextologist (cool job title!) Dr Doe. She talks "basics" but also things you may not know about (or atleast I didn't!)

• The Untitled Mag isn't devoted to sex, but definitley deals with it. Sadly they haven't posted in a while.

• The Pop-Up Musuem of Queer History is really important, and I also happen to be a history geek.

• Heavy-Petting just makes you happy.

• Fuck Yeah, Sex Positivity! is what it says on the tin and is my newest addictive find.

• This performance by Hari Nef hopefully will make you think.

• And to throw one more in, I love Arabelle Sicardi's fashion blog, but also like to check her tumblr Its Whatever, and I've been trying to make my way through her list of films through the feminst & queer gaze.

Sofie
(ps let me know of anything sexy I should also be consuming below)         

359.Wishes to stop cleaning

I suppose this post is only further evidence of the importance of details. The second image illustrates the simplicity of this outfit (something I've been wearing for the household chores that have been a big part of my summer) without the addition of a cute ribbon and socks needed to make me feel sassy and freeeeee. Hope your all well!
Sofie

358.Wishes to capture the details

A lot of what I wear is in the detail, detail which I sadly am never great at capturing in the photographic form. The gold and olive green glitter shimmering my eyelids, the rosy pink lipgloss, the pleat in my trousers, the flower clasp in my hair, and the deep burgundy shade of my shoes. Each element brings the outfit together, and puts the part of my mind that needs to curate a specific character to rest. I am more than my outfit, but when I'll be judged on that outfit it must tell the world exactly the me I want to be that day, the me that includes all those meticulous details.
Sofie

357.Wishes you'd hurry up

Outfit that I photographed seemingly eons ago, but never posted.
Sofie

356.Wishes to not become a hoarder

I assume as knowledgeable readers that you have seen the appropriately titled film “An Education” and will have memorised that scene in which an enthusiastic Jenny bubbles “I’m going to read what I want. And listen to what I want. And I’m going to look at paintings. And watch French films. And I’m gonna talk to people who know lots about lots.” I assume such things because I assume you are knowledgeable and youthful, and like me, related to the character of Jenny. Maybe even like me the lingering last notations of your diary entries bubble with similar wishes to spend a lifetime reading books in a quest to know lots about lots, and finally become the culturally cultivated individual you have always envisioned yourself as in the future.

Knowledge is most definitely a noble and just generally lovely pursuit. I have always loved the classroom, the ability to collect knowledge, and the ensuing spilling of trivia to friends and family, however wishing to become the embodiment of knowledge (aka Stephen Fry) alone is unworthy, despite my mother's ‘knowledge is power’ lectures. Knowledge is merely a tool, and should not be hoarded, unused in the desolate junk yards of our brains. You quite rightly may say knowledge has helped me understand the world and myself, and to write these reflections on knowledge itself, yet I still feel that my younger attitude towards it needs rethinking, with these few proposals:

-That I must not needlessly collect knowledge for the sake of an undusted collection.

-That I wish to be valued on what I do rather than what I know and that at the moment I’m rather lacking in the first category of doing.

-That we should give this opportunity to others, and remove this "hipster" (I dislike that word) attitude of valuation by pop culture reference.

And that I apologise for assuming that you are worthy readers if you have viewed the film "An Education". 

 Sofie

camping trip a year on

Dear Sofie,

I am feeling rather nostalgic and blue-sey about the existence of your blog. I hate to read and look at you a year older and wish to be you. I wish to be old Sofie. But old Sofie, you were not really more proactive were you? Just because you kept a blog? The truth is you were. You did more, you somehow managed to balance blogging with schoolwork and you were not consumed by fear/boredem/pity. You were not the neutral slob of goo that you have become in recent months. You were not floating in your own bubble of shit, merely consuming your own shitty thoughts, untill the shittiness became normal, became your polluted atmosphere.

You had people responding to you, appearing to care about the things you wrote, a small audience of readers that you could engage with. You've forgotten how rewarding that was, and forgotten to be grateful and humbled by their kind, thoughtful comments.

You've gotten so far into your own head, that you've stopped doing.
Yes, over the past year you did schoolwork, you showed a basic level of passion for the lessons you sat through, you worked hard to get some grades.
Then again, maybe it goes much further back.You had a lot more passion as a child, and now you have few to no passions or atleast have not helped them grow.Hard stubby seeds, this has become the winter of your life. But the season is summer, and theres nothing stopping you but yourself. The blog is a harsh reminder, but also a comforting one. You did it once, you can do it again.

Love 18 year old Sofie